Grown ups

I despise myself right now. I hate it, I hate this feeling. Remember this world, I will reach the heights of my dreams, I will be successful, I will be what I wanted to be, just give me a job and my end thereof is business, don't care if my college knowledge and attainment is not enough, I will still be successful. I will never be contented until there's a chance I can improve. 

No chains will bind me, no bed will attract me and no games will fool me. I will conquer the heights of my dreams. But.. only love can destroy that dream. If God doesn't want it then I have no choice but to give up the chase for greatness. Or if it means losing her more than what we have now, then I rather lose this dream of mine. So ambitious, yet I won't rush, step by step, I can finish it. A week will not pass without any productivity. this is my vow as a Grown Up Man. GUM. a gum that lasts, may it be tasteless, but it will never disappear. This white fire of mine.